HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY LIE-ING

I promised you a story.
Here it is my friend.
It may be a little bit hoary, 
But if you get it, then...
 
You'll be way ahead of the game.

HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY LIE-ING

 

A guy decides to go into business for himself. Not really knowing how to start he goes to a local “business start-up expert-consultant.” She tells him everything he’ll need to know about all of the technical aspects of getting started, what local offices to visit, bureaucracies to speak with, etc, etc.

So after taking copious and careful notes he goes the next day to the local government offices and begins his trek to start his new little enterprise. First he goes to get a business license but they tell him that he will need to make sure he’s zoned properly first. So he goes to the zoning office and they tell him that they cannot help him until he gets a business certificate. He goes to get a business certificate and they tell him that in order to get a certificate he will have to be approved for business by the local business council. He goes to the council who tell him they cannot approve of his business until he pays his business taxes in advance. He goes to the office of the tax assessor who tells him that before he can pay his taxes he must first have a business certificate.

Thoroughly bewildered, disgusted and angry he starts to go home thinking he’ll just give the whole thing up, so stupid, useless and illogical is the procedure for even getting started. On his way out he passes a little glass door which he had not noticed before, with a sign which read: Office of Doing Business. Curious and with nothing to lose he knocks to announce himself and then walks into the office. Behind a little desk sits an old man in a causal shirt with a desk clear of anything except a battery of telephones and a glass of water.

“What can I do for you?” asks the old man in a friendly and helpful tone.

The guy starts to unload about all of his problems, how he was passed from office to office and bureaucratic desk to bureaucratic desk and how no one would help him actually get started in his business. Then he tells the old man how he did everything right according to the consultant and how he had tried to follow every procedure of every official he encountered and how that only led to disaster. The old man listens patiently and with great sympathy and then bursts into laughter.

“Son, you might know a lot about how business is supposed to work but you haven’t learned anything yet about how it really works.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean business is not a game of rules kid, it’s a game of people who know what the rules really are. If you know the proper people and play them in the best way possible then even the wrongest of rules can be made right as rain. Because business is all about people, and those people are either standing in your way, or standing beside you going your way.”

With a sudden look of understanding spreading over his face the guy asks the old man, “So suppose you help me set up my new enterprise…?”

“Yes…” asks the old man.

“Then what can I do for you in return?”

To which the old man replies with a smile, “Son, pull up a chair, because now you’re talking real business.”

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